Sunday, September 02, 2012

my shoulders are getting heavier :(

finally allowing myself some time to blog !
need some place to rant before i actually blow up.
its been a really stressed up and screwed up past 2 weeks, with this week being the worse ever.

work's a bitch
responsibilities are increasing and i'm trying my very best to cope.
hopefully i can adjust and get used to being entrusted with stuff. :/
its not easy transiting from a junior to being expected to know almost everything in such a short while
like within 1 month? !@#$%^

and it sucks to have a stupid temp from geylang who is so weirddddd.
in front of patients she says stupid things which leave a bad impression of the lab.
e.g. "uncle ah, you be careful ah, i scared i poke you"
      "wait ah i better check, scarly they make mistakes"
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME, it is our job and responsibility to be careful.
you dont tell the patient to watch out for your mistakes !
you're causing our patients to not trust us and insulting our professionalism -.-
best part? she has more than 15 years worth of experience under her belt and still saying such rubbish.
and omg i even have to tell her to help process samples wtf.
if not she's just sitting there, not doing anything -.-

today was most extreme, the phlebotomists were so damn slowwwwww.
i ran round like a headless (naked) chicken, trying t do fingerpricks and give results, and omg.
i had set up a makeshift phlebotomy station in the ecg room to clear patients
yeap, its that bad. *pulls hair*

and i feel like i'm lagging behind in studies.
cause i'm forever tired and not able to focus :(((((

but i will try my very best (:

anyway, just got back from jazz's 21st celebration at mbs, her parents booked a suite for her :o
i finally got to meet ruiting! havent seen her since her own 21st in feb.
kinda awesome to catch up with her, miss those times where we walked home after dance (:

and met some of my sec 4 classmates, who havent seen me since 4 years ago.
most of them didnt even recognize me; case in point, one of them whom i knew since sec 1.
he was right in front of me and did a double take when realisation hit.
its kinda funny, but its like, at tt point, i know i've indeed changed alot since 4 years ago.

but hey, change is good.
it allows you to hide from people you dont wanna acknowledge either, LOL.
example, another sec 1 classmate, whom i really really detest,
her character is super authoritative,
but main reason was cause she kept psycho-ing me to join her church.
and when i rejected her countless times, she actually accused me of not having time for God.
BITCH PLEASE I'M NOT EVEN A CHRISTIAN. ever heard of free will?
super dont like people who are overzealous about religion and keep trying to convert people -.-

anyway my point is, she did look at me few times in the eye,
but she didnt know how t cfm my identity, heheh.
BUT eventually she still did find out, by nudging minyu and asking in a very fake manner.
"eh eh, your friend v v v familiar eh, she's the who who who ah?"
and then she patted my back and said "its good to see you again after so long"
so fake please, even minyu also felt tt she wasnt sincere. bwahah trust the bystander :D

but yeah, apart from suprising and avoiding people,
most of the time was camwhoring and getting interviewed. :D

and sometimes, i like being asked about what i'm doing.
its such a sure-ask topic and the best polite question either,
but in some sense, it gives me the opportunity to reflect back on my achievements.
its like they're asking me what i am proud of, to be who i am today.
and i'm glad tt there is at least something to my name,
which is the ability to juggle work and school, and my vampiric ability :B.
and that i know where i'd want to see myself achieve.

one classmate commented on how long i havent seen them, and said that i got lost.
THIS IS ANOTHER BITCH PLEASE.
same guy who randomly called me when i was in year 2 , and asked if i wanted to go clubbing -.-
same guy who asked me which poly i wanted to go when we got back prelim results.
was so pissed i told him, I am not lost. I simply chose to leave and go a different direction.

seriously i'm ashamed to admit i came from ahs.
the mentality there is fucking screwed up. go JC is natural, go poly is fail.

WELL, LOOK AT ME NOW.
I dont feel like a failure, cause i know i'm a fighter. (:

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